When GIANT PURPLE JELLYBEANS attack!
by a dragons wings
Summary: From the author that brought you 'Poems of the Mind' comes this new, fantastic story about a long lost civilisation, which... no, wait. That's another story. Sorry. ...about The Titans horrendous struggle to defeat the hordes of Giant Purple Jelly beans.


The Legend called Oriole.**  
**

**AN:** bleh. Phear me, I am the bat weasel.

**Disclaimer:** TEEN TITANS and all related characters and elements are copyrighted property of DC COMICS.

**Dedication:** Maniacal Drake, Thanks for helping me with this story. You have been my constant companion, my sidekick in story writing. I appriciate it! I mean it must be hard listening to me blabber on. 

* * *

Introduction

Today was a day like no other… unless every other day was a day like this.

It all started the morning of Saint Patrick's day with every one doing their usual thing. Beast Boy was in the kitchen making who-knows-what with tofu. Cyborg was on the Gamestation trying to beat any high score possible. Raven was doing… whatever it is that Raven does. Robin was busy answering Starfire's question and Starfire was busy questioning Robin, as mentioned before, but the question she was asking was not what you would ever expect.

"What is this Saint Patrick's day?" she asked.

Just as Robin was about to answer something terrible happened. THE ALARM …didn't go off.

It was far far worse.

It was-

" Breakfast is ready!"

-No, it was-

"Coming."

…sigh… Why do I bother? Ok -

"Be right there!"

-no No NO! It was-

"Just a minute!"

-AH! NO! Really it was… looks around suspiciously… Beast boy's cooking!

(**AN:** every one does Starfire's cooking, so I decided who the heck wants to eat tofu everyday.)

"Yo, Green man! Not again! This stuff is horrible. Why can't you eat like a normal person? You know, using real food?"… Certainly not Cyborg.

There was one thing that was bothering everyone. Why hadn't the alarm gone off? Normally when you were just in the middle of a good meal (or in this case a bad one) or in the middle of a great game, conversation and/or a good book then the alarm would go off. It's funny how the Teen Titans just happened to purchase one of those alarms that always went off when you were in the middle of something.

However, if the alarm were to go off it would probably be to warn the Titans of the screaming citizens, fire strewn buildings and forty-feet-tall monsters that were currently attacking the city's mid-west. But… it didn't. This was because of a freak accident involving some glue, a doughnut and a pair of workman's rubber pants, further down the line at the transmition station.

Instead the distraught mayor was left to contact the Titanic superheroes through a more… ordinary means.

…_Bring bring…_

The telephone rang. This meant that Robin or Cyborg had to go answer it. …Except Cyborg and the other Titans were too busy making sure that the alarm wouldn't jump out and catch them off guard. It was Robin who slowly went to reach for the reciver, only to answer the call that would change their life.

For the moment.

He came back the table full of Titans with an utterly confused and not-so-convinced look on his face.

The silence broke. "So… who is it?"

But Robin just stood there aimlessly. They waited.

"The Hive?"

"Nope"

"Cinderblock?"

"No"

"Slade?"

"No"

"Warp?"

"No"

"What about Mumbo Jumbo?"

"No"

"THEN WHO?"

"Giant… Giant purple _jellybeans_ are attacking the city"

All eyes turned to Beastboy.

"Hey, What are you looking at _me_ for?" he exclaimed indignantly.

"Sorry, force of habit" said Cyborg.

Food to die for

The Titans arrived at the scene and saw the chaos. It was huge, horrible and very, _very _purple. I wonder what thoughts were running through their minds as they stared up at the 40 feet tall monsters. Mmmm…. Lets take a look shall we?

Robin: Slade must have been looting numerous toxic waste dumps, heavy chemical plants, collecting radioactive liquids and Mammoth's gym socks ( which is already just plain sick), plus a bunch of other very disgusting things in order to create a new chemical mutagen for an army of mutants! But then the guy mixing it together had a slip-up and a bag of grape jellybeans fell into the chemicals, ultimately creating a horde mutated Jellybean monsters!

Starfire: It is the evil alien Abelaeken war-mongers, from the planet Toronossi here to invade and colonize Earth and force it's inhabitants to praise it's brilliance. Though I must admit, they would be far more menacing had they chosen a form other than that of oversized grape flavored sugar treats.

Cyborg: It must be the evil of Brother Blood, coming to seize control of the city with a phalanx of genetic-bred creatures. And after getting roboticized, then blown up, then brought back to life he really musn't be as competent as before. So by the time he realised 'What a coincidence, they look like purple jellybeans!' It was already too late. What he was really trying to make, we may never know.

Beast Boy: Yo! It's a race of inter-dimensional sugar demons who have come to capture Jump City's fair inhabitants and harvest them for their vile, nasty, sugary ambitions, by cocooning the people and sucking out their now cherry flavored life juices to sate their hunger and make sweets out of people!

Raven: BeastBoy's been into my herbal tea again, hasn't he?

So the Titans started into the battle and in the background you could hear the clash and clang, you could hear grunts and groans and the heavy sighs of wounded heroes. But the battle wasn't over, infact it had just begun. The screaming citizens didn't help as they raced around in fear and panic - it wouldn't be long until one of them got hurt.

The leader reached down, he knew what he had to do. He got out the yellow communicator - he needed backup, _they _needed backup. The signal was weak. It began with static.

"zzz… Hello? Robin?" The face of the Titans East Archer appeared on screen, "What up?"

From the background came an irate female voice, "Speedy, get off the damn line, this is a serious call! Move it!" The face was pushed roughly aside to be replaced with a darker one, "Robin. What d'you need?"

"What we need is help. There's a situation down here, and it's getting worse. We'll need your assistance as soon as possible."

"Ah –" Bumblebee was cut off by the two synchronised voices of Mas y Menos.

"_Con que, Seńor Pajaro?_" They said. Bumblebee glared at them before turning back to the screen.

"Yeah, what they said." She gestured. Robin paused to best consider how to phrase his request. He put on his most serious face.

"Giant Purple Jellybeans are attacking the city." He said in a no no-nonsense way.

Titans East paused. They blinked. Then they laughed, and laugh hard they did.

"Good one!"

"Yeah right."

"_Otra vez, quizas._"

"Sorry, but BeastBoy isn't getting us this time." finished Aqualad.

"No, no!" started Robin, "I'm serious. This is a serious situation!"

"Okay, okay. We get the joke, man." Speedy was currently on screen, "Though, seeing as it's St. Patrick's day, shouldn't you have made these 'Giant Jellybeans' green?"

Robin's jaw tightened as another building went down in the background almost deafeningly, followed by Starfire's cry of, "They are _not_ Green. They are purple, and they are _real_!"

Bumblebee (who had managed to wrestle back control of the communication device) gave Robin an exasperated look. "Yeah, okay, whatever. Later then." And she cut out.

The Titans were left alone and helpless now knowing that their fellow comrades would not believe them. Figuring another attempt was futile, Robin pocketed the circular thingie and re-joined the fray. The struggle continued.

You could hear buildings crash and collapse, and cries of defeat seemed to slip their way in there too. The noise got louder and louder - infact it got so loud that it would be impossible to hear a pin drop.

Unless you had supersonic powers, which the newest person to enter the scene just happened to have. Coincidence? I think not.

The figure of a girl stood tall and proud as her hair waved smoothly in the wind.

…

… well, not _really_, but she did stand. And she _was_ a girl.

In fact, she was the wondeful, extraordinary, fanticlisclimo…. uh… Oriole! And she was currently huddled under a shop canopy picking her nose.

(**An:** Don't giver her that look! It's not like **you've** never done it!)

A piece of purple spludge came raining down on the pavement in front of her, and Oriole stared dazedly at it for a moment before remembering the true reason for her introduction. She was here to help.

Oriole stepped boldly (or stupidly) into the path of an oncoming jellybean. She looked up at it's ferocious purple face before being whisked out of the way by none other then the infamous Beastboy.

Once they had settled safely on the other side of the pavement Beastboy turned to her, "What the heck did you think you were doing out there!" Oriole just stared at him, and

"Pfft! Saving your life, of course." was the first thing that our hero said. Beastboy just stopped for a moment and stared at her.

And stared.

And stared.

"Wha?"

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Me: To everyone who's reading this especially the Insanity Club I would like to say thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! 

The Spirit of the story (otherwise known as our Narrator): Pfft! Now you're sounding boring.

Me: Okay. Please read and review, as your opinions and contructive critisims are most appreciated.  



End file.
